When to Walk Away: 3 Signs It’s Time to Leave Your Job or Relationship
This lesson has shown up in different situations, both personally and professionally. Let's unpack this and see how it can relate to you and your life.
The next few paragraphs get a little deep and borderline theological/metaphysical. Still, I think it's relevant to mention it as part of the big picture. If you feel it's too much to digest at the moment, you can skip ahead to the section that says BRINGING IT TOGETHER.
Faith, by definition, is believing that something is or will happen without having proof in the present moment. Or, as a poster I read said so concisely, "Faith is not hoping that God can, it's knowing that God will." Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, the concept of faith is part of human nature. Parents tell their kids that they have faith in them, bosses say to their employees that they have faith in their abilities, and patients tell their doctors they have faith in their knowledge and expertise. Faith is one of the driving forces in our lives. The question eventually arises: What's the difference between Faith and Trust? As I've come to understand it, trust occurs after you've seen evidence that the outcome happened before. One might argue that the examples of faith I mentioned above are actually examples of trust, but the distinction to keep in mind is that if the desired outcome occurred in someone other than themself, then the individual perceives they are instilling faith because the previously occurring situation did not happen to them.
A fantasy, on the other hand, as one definition reads, is "an imagined or conjured up sequence fulfilling a psychological need; a daydream." For the 83% of the human population that believes in a higher power (myself included), this definition can feel rather harsh compared to the meaning of faith. For the 17% that don't believe in a higher power, faith and fantasy are synonymous.
FAITH VS FANTASY
Of course, every person and situation is different. Still, if the desired outcome happens, your faith is validated, and you feel joy, increased self-esteem, and increased faith. If the desired outcome does not occur, feelings of disappointment, anger, doubt, and lower self-esteem may occur.
BRINGING IT TOGETHER
So, how do you know if you have faith or fantasy? The answer is time! The only way to know is to let time pass, be patient, and see if the desired outcome occurs. But that's the challenge! How long do you wait? How long should you be patient? Should you try and help your desired outcome along? While some outcomes have an exact timeline, such as test results or event dates. Others require YOU to decide to stop waiting or being patient, and again that's the challenge.
In your personal life, this could be waiting to see if a relationship is going through a bad time or if it's dysfunctional and irreparable. I think we can all relate to a relationship that had a lot of good times, but things became pretty bad. Should I do more? Should I seek help? Should I walk away? Am I giving up? What will I do without this person? What will people think?